How coming to a neutral state of being births clarity

Tuesday, January 25, 2022

How coming to a neutral state of being births clarity

The time it's reflective mood sesh with me at 8.30 in the PM, my beige boring outfit and why I welcome non-back-smooching feedback.

I know pretty much absolutely zero but it's good to have regular gut movement, guys.

When I reflected how I used to approach life in my teens throughout early adult years, I realized being in a state of neutrality was such a challenge. I easily was overpowered by the extremes of emotions and if it wasn't blinding depression, it was a state of reasonless euphoria. I'd like to think that I have gotten quite used to the movement of emotions within that I mind them no more. In myself and in others, they play out the same way. From an energy of affinity to an energy of aversion. Though, I pay heed to information that might get convoluted in knots of physical sensations, I rest more within the groove after the dust settles and still water comes through. This, of course, took quite a bit of suffering on my part. The suffering was optional, as they said but for me, the depth of it sprung me out of the vital darkness. I found a light. It's there not because I've relinquished the dark. It's there inside the darkness. So then, I learned how to hone something dark and something light and come to be, more of myself.  I see this in others, too. It's an amazing thing to observe. There's within that space of noticing, I become acutely aware, I have no monkeys in the circus under my name. I'm just there.

PS: Some concerned readers have asked as to why do I need to post photos of myself along with the content that I come up with which usually is mundane and personal. I would like to say that I have no justification. I used to feel like photos of myself were unnecessary. In a way, this still holds true. I am also, sharing outfits that I wear casually about the homestead. So, it's like doing two things at once. What's that idiom? Killing two birds with a stone? Something of that sort. I'd received both kinds of messages ranging from applauding to absolutely the opposite with some kind of judgement in the mix but hey, I'm too old to pretend to feel like words of others have to bend to fit my narrative. I appreciate both kinds of comments precisely because they hit differently and I sure like to be reminded that I'm no special snowflake. 

That being said, here's another unnecessary portrait of me:

That's all from me for now, friends. I hope you're going into the week with a burst of optimism. Please enjoy your life. Thanks for peeking through mine.

shanaz@RS | 9:45 PM | Labels: /

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